Wow. Obviously this struck a nerve with you. You’re entitled to your opinion but no I don’t believe you can love someone until you heal from heartache. He was with a woman for 8 years who devastated him. That takes time to get over. I think it’s selfish of a man to ask a woman to be his shoulder to cry on. She shouldn’t be responsible for healing him. You have to take steps to heal yourself. Healthy relationships are 50/50. Give and take. This person even told me himself he wasn’t ready and needed time. Yes it requires more work to love someone in this situation, but I think it’s asking too much of a person. People need to be healthy and whole before getting into relationships. And you can’t love someone if you don’t love yourself first. It’s not selfish of me to say goodbye to the heartache he was causing me. You have to take care of yourself sometimes. I told him when he was ready, I would be here. But until he takes the time and steps to let go of his anger over his divorce, he’s not going to have a healthy love to give to someone else.