You know this guy. You might even feel incredibly drawn to him. He’s the guy who wants to and promises to — save you.
Maybe you’re poor. Maybe your’e lonely. Maybe you have daddy issues or are just overall depressed. But whatever it is, he is more than happy to volunteer to fix it. It seems sweet, so giving, and kind. But it’s not.
Being the Savior in a relationship is way way more about him and his desire to feel good about himself, than it is about you. It’s paradoxical because “saving you” makes him feel good, which is really what he’s after. It’s a way to get validation that he’s enough. To fill a void. So in a backwards sort of way, he’s using you.
And guess what happens once he starts to see he can’t make you happy? He has to find a new girl to “save”.
Because you’re not meeting his need for validation. He needs it to feel good about himself. It’s not all his fault though.
Being a savior requires a victim. Lots of women are quick to fall into this attitude as well. Whoa is me. Life has been hard to me. I’ve been hurt. Blah blah blah. The victim.
I’ll admit I’ve been this girl before. And I actually have had a pretty hard life. My father molested me. The father of my daughter left me during the pregnancy and has still never met her. I’ve been divorced. Had family…
